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    Speaking of Boo-Boos

    Check out this video of Robbie Madison's jump in Vegas on New Years Eve that a friend sent to me.

    I can't believe the dumbass ESPN reporter keeps the poor bastard trapped in this interview with a broken hand and a "gash to the bone".


    Jimmie Got a Boo-Boo

    With all that's going on in the world these days--the new Obama administration, massive layoffs, the upcoming Super Bowl, etc.--I thought maybeI would poke my head in on Nascar.com to see what was going on in the world of stock car racing. Here's the title to one of the big stories of the day concerning defending champion Jimmie Johnson: "Johnson Cuts Finger During Rolex 24 at Daytona". Wow, talk about drama. I read a title like that and I think, "Did he go for the Sponge Bob band-aid or the Spiderman band-aid?"


    Then I started reading the article and I felt bad, because I learned that Jimmie's laceration was much more severe than I first thought. He actually damaged a tendon and a nerve on his left middle finger, a key digit required by NASCAR drivers to express their true feelings to the their fellow competitors, albeit less used by the squeaky-clean Hendricks driver stable (Dale Earnhardt, Jr. notwithstanding). Johnson cut his finger  while "attempting to cut a small hole in his firesuit in order to feed a tube from a cooling shirt through the pocket of his suit", according to the article, which also reminds us that two years ago year Kaptain Klutz broke his wrist in the offseason falling off a golf cart.

    Thankfully for Jimmie's fans, he won't miss the Daytona 500 as a result of his injury, and naturally everybody wants the three-time champion in the starting lineup where he belongs, if only so we can watch the #48 car get put through the blender on Turn 4. So get well, Jimmie! And here's some NASCAR band-aids to help you out!


    Armageddin' It

    Say your prayers, because the world is definitely coming to an end this week! It has nothing to do with the inauguration of America's first black president, although there are certainly people who thought it would be a cold day in Kabul before that ever happened. And even though Nostrodomus says we still have a good three years left before the sun super-novas, something far more ominous has occurred that clearly warns us that the End of Days are upon us. The Arizona Cardinals are in the Super Bowl. The Arizona Cardinals are in the Super Bowl! Aaaaa! What have we done to ourselves??? We're all going to die!!!


    Earth explodes as the Cardinals take the field in SB XLIII



    For Whom the Rell Tolls

    With all of the doom and gloom hovering over the state of the printed press vs. the Internet these days, I'm kind of surprised that newspapers haven't made a concerted marketing campaign on the advantages of paper news over electronic news. For instance, you can't line the birdcage or wrap fish with the Internet, and it's much easier to sit on the throne Sunday morning with your favorite section of the paper than it is to surf the net with your laptop in your, er, lap. Plus if you just so happen to drop your mouse in the tank, you're done for! Here's the electonic version of a funny article about Gov. Jody Rell that I read while ruling my kingdom on the throne this morning, although I'm sure you could do without the visual. It's from Colin McEnroe of the Hartford Courant, my former professor, and no, I'm not just linking to him because I'm an apple-polisher whose grade is still pending!!!


    It's All Downhill From Here!

    I had my bad days of skiing, from falling off poma lifts and launching runaway skis to doing a swan dive into a snowbank and breaking my nose. But I never experienced anything like this poor sap did on New Years Day at Vail, Colorado. Boy, you gotta be wondering what 2009 has in store for you if this is the way it starts!


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